Have you ever noticed how easy it is to be hard on yourself? Even that sentence itself sounds like an oxymoron, right?
Maybe it sounds like one, because in a perfect world, it would be.
But, as we all know, life isn’t always perfect; and neither are we. But the most important thing to try to remember is that it is okay to be imperfect.
Many times I have heard people say that “we are perfect in our imperfections“- that our flaws are what makes us who we are. And, as much as I agree with both of these statements, I can also acknowledge that some days it is harder to let these words ring true. Some days, you may just feel that your flaws aren’t what make you special, or unique, they are just what make you different, maybe even lesser than others.
We all can, and will, inevitably, have those days every now and then where we feel we aren’t really the best at anything. But, here are some things to remember when your mind starts wandering towards negative self-talk:
1.) First and foremost, be proud of all you DO have to offer!
I know that can sound kind of cheese-y, but just think about it! You may not be a mathematician, but you may one of the best bakers in town. You may not be a gymnast, but you may be one of the most empathetic people in all of your social groups. The point is, that YOU have powers within you that you may not even consider to be anything special, because they come to you naturally. We, as humans, have a tendency to hone on the things that we don’t have or that we feel needs to be improved, and disregard those awesome qualities that we already posses. So, on those days when you’re getting down on yourself for all that you want to be, remind yourself of all the things you already ARE. Those qualities that you are taking for granted may be exactly what someone else is getting down on themselves about.
2.) Practice makes perfect!
Okay, so, I’m not entirely sure I ascribe to this philosophy in a literal sense; but, practice does absolutely make improvement! For example, you may have had dreams of being a famous musician, or professional dancer, or professional athlete… but you gave up on those dreams because you felt like you didn’t hold a candle to the other people you were put up against. And, even if it is true, you may have still given up too soon!
There are other ways to be involved in the things that you love! Pursuing your passions do not have to be all or nothing. It doesn’t have to be professional athlete or no sports whatsoever, or famous artist or throwing away every easel, brush, or drawing material you ever possessed. You can still love things without being the absolute best at them! There is no shame in growth; no matter how big or small you may think that change is. There should be no shame in accepting that yeah, maybe you’re not going to be the next Da Vinci, but you can still create beautiful art. The point here is to remember why you are so passionate about whatever it is you are passionate about. Keep practicing! Because, although you may never be the best there ever was, you can still be the best you ever were. And, that’s what life is about, after all, isn’t it? Being the best version of yourself that you possibly can be- whatever that means to you, is up to you to decide.
Piggy-backing off of that last comment…
3.) At the end of the day, you are left to face yourself
This may seem a bit grim, but it is not meant to be. When I hear this saying, my mind doesn’t go to solitude, or isolation, or loneliness- quite the contrary. I think of how, at the end of my day, when all is said and done, I am the one reflecting on the reactions, actions, and initiatives that I took throughout that day. No one else was a part of the private logic I immersed myself in throughout the day.
So, what I’m really trying to illustrate with this point is that you are the only person who can ultimately decide what is best for you and best to do in any given situation. And you will the one who can be content or discontent with those decisions. It is important to do what you believe is best. Keep an open mind, and open heart, but, at the end of the day, you should not forget what you believe is right in your heart of hearts. Make sure that your choices make you comfortable and proud of who you are!
Are you struggling with accepting your whole self, seeing your strengths instead of just your weaknesses or would like some guidance with self-love, or are you just interested in talking to someone about things going on in your life because you simply feel that you do not as you should? Sometimes having a partner in your journey can help. Give us a call to set up a free phone consultation at Life Skills Resource Group Orlando at 407-355-7378, and one of our Orlando Individual Counselors, Orlando Life Coaches, Orlando Teen Counselors, and Orlando Child counselors would be more than happy to help you, a family member, or a friend work on changing your life.