I’m sure that each and every one of us has insecurities; we are typically our own toughest critics, after all.
But when a “flaw” you see in yourself becomes an
obsession, that’s when we may want to take a step back and really analyze what’s going on.
Why does that thing about who you are make you so uncomfortable?
Sometimes the answer to this question isn’t so clear… but, sometimes it is. Often times we compare ourselves to what we used to look like, or who we felt we used to be… it’s easy to idealize something that we aren’t anymore, or attributes we no longer possess. And sometimes we compare ourselves to other people. Only acknowledging the traits that they possess that we wish were our own. But, even our former selves, or the other people we are comparing ourselves to, had/have insecurities of their own.
So, the question becomes, how do we learn to be okay with, and accept, who we are? What are the steps we need to take to really know how to love ourselves for everything we are, instead of disliking ourselves for everything we’re not? The journey to self-love and acceptance is definitely not a quick and easy one- but, it is well worth the time and effort necessary to achieve it.
I found an article titled 5 Ways to Feel Better in Your Body, by Cristina Cavalieri DOro, on TinyBuddha.com, and felt it went perfectly with this blog post. And, I think it’s important to take note that it says to “feel better in your body“… this phrase doesn’t necessarily mean the message is only geared towards people with self-image insecurities. Feeling comfortable in your own body also implies that you feel comfortable in your own skin- in who you are as a person.
According to Cristina, there are five steps that help bring you that much closer to feeling better in your body, and they are:
… I forgave myself for letting myself go, for not believing in myself, for being addicted to foods and habits that brought me down, for not having confidence or knowing my value, and for not using my strengths or working on my weaknesses.
Guilt and shame bring negative energy and will just keep you stuck. Period!
Forgiveness helps you let go of the past and enables you to focus on making healthy choices in the present.
Before, I didn’t love or respect myself. No matter how great I looked, I would always find fault. I was putting my value on outside appearances to feel validated. If I didn’t look a certain way, that meant I was unlovable.
Self-love doesn’t mean you can let yourself go. It means you have enough appreciation and value for yourself to create habits that nourish your soul and your growth…
… Question everything and become aware of what you need—what your body needs to thrive and what feels good.
It has nothing to do with trying to look a certain way just because the media says so; it has to do with paying attention to how you’re feeling and being rooted within your body. Our bodies aren’t separate from us; they’re part of us, and we need to pay attention to them…
… Our bodies give us signals to let us know what they need. We may feel tired or sluggish when we need more sleep or water. We may get headaches or light-headedness when we need a stress-relieving practice, like yoga or meditation. Until we pay attention and work with them, we’ll always feel an imbalance.
It’s not what we do once in a while that brings change, but what we do consistently—day in and day out, when we feel like it and especially when we don’t…
This was just a small excerpt from the full article posted on TinyBuddha.com. Love what you’ve read so far? Click here for Cristina’s full blog post! She did an amazing job at explaining the importance of each of these steps, and relating it back to personal experiences of her own.
The point I’m trying to get across in this week’s blog post is that, although we may have had different ideal situations and/or appearances for ourselves, we can still learn to love, and should learn to love, every part of who we are. Following these five steps will definitely help get you on the right path to self-love, but the real change has to come from the way you view yourself as a person! Once you begin to accept who you are and who you are capable of being (for yourself), the rest of the journey will begin to make a lot more sense. It’s not necessarily going to be easy, but it will definitely be worth it.
– Virginia Johnson
Are you struggling with self acceptance, or being happy with who you are, or are you just interested in talking to someone about things going on in your life because you simply feel that you do not as you should? Sometimes having a partner in your journey can help. Give us a call to set up a free phone consultation at Life Skills Resource Group Orlando at 407-355-7378, and one of our Orlando Individual Counselors, Orlando Life Coaches, Orlando Teen Counselors, and Orlando Child counselors would be more than happy to help you, a family member, or a friend work on changing your life.